Manchester Madness

Well what a weekend.

It was my uncles stag do on saturday so I was up at the crack of dawn ready for it. I headed off to pick a friend up at 8.30 PM and then to make my way down to Isaac Wilsons (Weatherspoons) which was near Middlesbrough train station.

Dressed up looking like the nuttiest golfer around we walked into the pub to be met by the rest of the lads who where all dressed alike. Having my first pint at 9AM and a bacon bun, I knew it was going to be a heavy day.

My Outfit

My Outfit

Nipping into Dundas Arcade shortly before heading to the train station to pick up some cans for the journey was an experience in itself. Never got so many looks or sniggers in my life but hey, at least we all as stupid.

We got on the train just in time and went to our reserved seats. 2 tables either side of each other with enough seats for us all.

As soon as we where on the train we cracked a can open and went through the rules of the game!
1, +2 points if caught drinking with the wrong hand. (You had to drink with the opposite to as you would normally)
2, +2 points for every pub.
3, -1 point for every drink drunk.
4, +4 points for every un allocated toilet break.
5, -5 points for doing a dare set by the other players.
6, +2 points for talking about work or girlfriends.

So it was pretty clear, but everyone had gained points before we got off the bloomin train.

The best man also had a little ‘task’ sheet for the stag which he had to complete over the weekend. Also he has a box of eggs for a game of egg roulette. (6 eggs in a box – 4 are boiled, 2 are not. You pick one randomly and splat it on some ones head!)

Stupidly enough after a lot of alcohol had been consumed on the train they decided to have a game of egg roulette whilst sat on the train. This was a bad idea from start to finish but I think we all knew that which kind of added to the excitement. Ha.

Upon arriving in manchester and getting off the train we staggered through manchester station trying to find out where out hotel was and which direction it was in so we could stagger that way. It was a well nice day in manchester, sun shining, dry, no wind, shame we didn’t find a beer garden but meh.

After slowly making our way for about 10 minutes and not been any wiser of the location of the hotel we went into Yates and just thought we would drink some more.

It was full of city supporters at that time, and a bunch of northerners (Who sound like geordies) marching into the pub and making loads of noise dressed as golfers (and goafers) didn’t go down to well but we where to drunk to care. 😀

Blandys Stag Do

After a few bevvies we left Yates and tried again to find the hotel. Success this time as it turned out to be about a minute away from Yates. We checked into our rooms and went and chucked our bags down.

We all met back down in reception and then left for more pubs.

I lost count of how many pubs we went into and how many shots we drank. We did meet up with about 30 lasses on a hen party who we where all pestering to swap our boxers with for a pair of there pants (It was one of the tasks that needed to be completed) but I *think* we failed that one.

Before going on the stag do one of the lads had booked us all in on a virtual golf thing at some bar called ‘The Green’. The idea behind it was brilliant, although when you are smashed, its so hard to even see the ball, never mind hit it. I think we had a bout 1 proper go each, before it turned into a free for all of rugby tackling, throwing objects and general drunken banter.

Me and Blandy

Me and Blandy

We left there at about 6.30 and headed back to the hotel to get changed and ready for the night time antics. (We didn’t wear our fancy dress as apparently its really hard to get into clubs in manchester in groups of lads, never mind groups of lads in fancy dress.)

We met in the reception again and went and hit the pubs and clubs.

First stop Yates again. One of the lads had booked a stripper for the stag (We didn’t know this at the time.) She came in and she didn’t hold back at all.

Ill embed the video here when I upload it online.

After the stripper we left Yates and ended up on what I think was Canal Street.

I didn’t trigger at first but we went into a pub on the corner called Queer, and when your sober you know exactly what its going to be, sadly, we didn’t.

All the lads

All the lads

Well, I’ve never been so shocked in all my life. There was 100’s of gays everywhere. After some quite shocking antics that we seen in there, me and a lad decided to leave that area and the rest of the lads and head off to a different part of manchester for some proper clubs.

We partied on until about 2/3 o’clock in the morning before deciding to go back to the hotel. We where only in the room for about 5 minutes before we heard loads of noise in the hallway. It was some of the other lads coming back.

We continued the party in one of the hotel rooms before going to sleep.

I awoke the next morning, very tired but not hungover which was a surprise. After meeting up in McDonald’s which was opposite the hotel and laughing at who was struggling to cope we headed off to get out train home.

The journey home was so quiet with most people falling asleep.

Good times in Manchester eh! 😀

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